The O’Toole Chronicles: The Life of Billy Joel

I don’t need you to worry for me ‘cause I’m alright
I don’t want you to tell me it’s time to come home
I don’t care what you say anymore this is my life
Go ahead with your own life and leave me alone
     —- Billy Joel – My Life -1978

I recently watched a new HBO series featuring the great musician, William Martin Joel, more famously known as Billy Joel. It inspired me to look back to the roots of this now timeless entertainer – how he worked up the rungs of stardom, survived and endured despite an incredible amount of personal and professional troubles, and rose to become one of the most influential musicians of our time. If this troubled kid from Long Island can go from total obscurity to one of the most popular entertainers of an era, only to battle crippling financial and personal problems, to then again rise from the ashes like the mighty Phoenix and succeed, there is hope for the rest of us.

Billy Joel is one of the most accomplished and most prolific musicians of all time.

Billy has sold over 160 million records, and he is regarded as the fourth most successful solo singer of all time. Upon reflection, it is clearer to me now that in the early years, Billy Joel was a messiah to many teenagers as we grappled with the confines and teachings of the catholic church and the reality of growing up with difficulties in the 1970s. In those years, Billy provided a voice and an attitude that many adopted when we couldn’t find our own.

It is only now that we can marvel at Billy Joel’s stunning longevity. Many of us have experienced walking into a neighborhood restaurant or mall, hearing a familiar Billy Joel song and feeling transported magically to that time and place where parental defiance was the order of the day.  Many of us growing up in the 70s played Billy’s vinyl records in our homes, using some of the tunes as our anthem to rebel and get out from under the grip of suffocating homelife.

When you look back at his entire body of work, it is amazing that he turned out hit record after hit record, even when his personal and professional life were less than calm and supportive. His lyrics allowed for the listener to exhale, breathe and look around at the larger things in life. Songs like Piano Man, She Is Always a Woman, Uptown Girl, Allentown, We Didn’t Start the Fire, Moving Out, It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me, My Life, You May Be Right, Just the Way You Are, and my favorite, Good Night Saigon. These songs lifted our souls and allowed us to look inward to find a peaceful place where you felt accepted and to achieve some personal equilibrium.

Interestingly, once you get past Billy’s awards and record-breaking performance, you find a conflicted and complicated individual. You see a gifted person who dealt with abandonment since childhood—a childhood where he constantly sought out a connection to his absentee father.

Despite his commercial success, Billy had many challenges. He lived through three failed marriages, including his highly publicized marriage to supermodel Christie Brinkley. While this relationship was ill-fated, it produced the true love of his life, his daughter Alexa.  He also has two other daughters, Della and Remy, with his current wife, Alexis. His manager and friend, and former brother-in-law, allegedly stole or misappropriated $90 million. What is it about trusting family members that inevitably leads to jealousy and greed consuming their heart?

At the height of his career, Billy found himself on the verge of financial collapse. He only learned this fact when he was trying to reconstruct his home and had problems with financing. Some wake up call for a person who was presumed to have tens of millions of dollars in the bank.

At that point, Billy made many difficult decisions, and he had to fire (and sue) his manager. He also had to change out his long term producer and drummer.

It wasn’t just mistrusting the wrong people and personality issues that plagued Billy’s life, Billy’s alcohol addiction was a significant contributing cause to his mid-career failures. After years of denying that he had an issue, he finally admitted himself to the Betty Ford Center to treat his addiction.

For us early fans, we never would have guessed that he was as troubled and pained as he was. But I guess there is tragedy and tumult in all corners of our society, regardless of your zip code or tax bracket.

Billy’s story now gets wild.

In 2011, he penned a very personal goodbye to his band. In his letter, Billy explained that he was done touring and was essentially retiring.

After delivering this letter, Billy retreated to his safe space to find his center again—the waters of Long Island. He spent much of his time there on his boat where he attempted regain his spirit and reflect on his journey.

He righted his ship and reengineered himself, and also found his fourth wife. He found love, joy, and happiness. His second act. Or maybe his third.

In 2012, Hurricane Sandy devastated the region, including his beloved Long Island. Billy banded together with other musical giants and played a benefit concert to raise funds for the hurricane victims. Yet another way that Billy embodied the idea that tragedy can create opportunity and rebirth.

The unexpected reemergence of Billy Joel during this benefit concert sparked a massive interest from the public and began a titanic revival for this retired musician. Buoyed by this newfound adoration, Billy embarked on a 100-show ten-year tour beginning at Madison Square Garden. His renaissance continued. He sold over 109 million tickets and grossed over $260 million—incredible by any measure. He continued the American love affair until his recently announced medical issue.

Billy Joel, while once hovering around bankruptcy, is now worth $250 million and is loved by another generation. How do we explain this new fame?

As one of Billy’s friends described, you feel his vulnerability, honesty, and authenticity. He is one of us. His songs are timeless. I really do believe that one of the keys to success, in anything, is authenticity and vulnerability.

I guess the point of this column is that we should really understand that the people we idolize and think have it all, are really just like us and have the same problems that the rest of us have. We should provide a safe haven of empathy for our idols as they grow forward and experience difficult times that many of us can identify with.  And like Billy, if push through and confront challenges, we too can witness an unanticipated revival.